HALLELUJAH!!!

I have a secret.

This review will reveal a hidden truth that only Lynda and a dearly departed Basset Hound named Guinness have understood until now.

O.K. here goes, for whatever it is worth.

I do not live in the Texas Hill Country. I do not reside in Spring Branch or Comal County or even in Congressional District 21 as a blue voter registration card in my wallet seems to indicate. No, no and hell no.

I actually live in South Park.

Please understand that I am not referring to the physical town of the same name, but, rather, to the expanded universe of the television series which is where I absorb all of my spiritual and temporal knowledge. I know, I know...most people turn to CNN or FOX News or The New York Times or My Weekly Reader or even to the Mormon Church, God forbid. Not me.

And for all these past years I have agonized over why, at the end of each enlightening episode, Trey Parker and Matt Stone have used a clip of a Braniff Airlines 727 in the closing credits. To me, the mysteries of the universe and the heavens held no candle to this particular enigma, and so it is with unbridled glee that just a few minutes ago I stumbled upon the answer at Wikipedia — “the free encyclopedia that anyone can edit.” The heavy burden has been removed, the knowldege is upon me and I am a happy man, a happy man, indeed.